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Killer Gingerbread Man Statues

Killer Gingerbread Man Statues

Hmm. Is it still ok to say gingerbread man or is it now gingerbread being? Well, either way, it turns out that those cute little human-shaped cookies made from gingerbread don't actually enjoy being eaten and have finally snapped, escaped from the baking sheet in the oven, and gone on a murderous holiday rampage in the kitchen armed with sharpened candy canes and even a nail gun!

Yep, these cool new Killer Gingerbread Man Statues, inspired by the murderous little ones in the delightful holiday movie classic Krampus, have finally been depicted as whimsical handcrafted figurines to decoratively place around the kitchen or just to guard the cookies and milk from Santa Claus. Hmm... Santa Claus. The overly jolly man who wants to break into your house, track chimney soot all over the carpet from his boots that he didn't take off, and then give away counterfeit branded toys, which were made by enslaved elves in a tax-evading, unregulated workshop / factory sweatshop on the North Pole that is spewing so much toxic pollution into the atmosphere that it is the leading cause of the melting ice cap, to all the children who were nice this year... Right!? The hardworking, job-providing, and energy-conscious Ebenezer Scrooge, the bullied Grinch who was different and just wanted to be left alone as far away from the loud and obnoxious Whos as possible, and now Gruss Vom Krampus and his legion of killer gingerbread beings who deal with all of the naughty ones... these are the true heroes of the holidays!

Also, that snitching shelf elf doesn't stand a chance around these killer holiday decorations. 🎄🔪😉

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