Basically Dead Tombstone Candle
"Time is the fire in which we burn." - Delmore Schwartz (Poet)
After you turn 21, unless you look forward to retirement age or senior discounts on coffee, another birthday just means one more year round the sun and one more year closer to the very end. Even worse, birthday cakes begin to have more candles on top than the actual cake below, plus it gets harder and harder to blow out all those candles every year and there's probably a major risk of starting a monstrous wildfire with all those dangerous flickering flames. The solution is this cool new and quite morbid Basically Dead Tombstone Candle. This macabre tombstone-shaped candle consolidates all of those depressing birthday candles into one single happier candle that celebrates your descent over the hill and inevitable rapidly approaching demise. Now, if the grim reaper happens to attend your birthday party... you might as well let him cut the cake with his scythe before following him over to the other side. 🎂⚰️
